I just found out that my boss is not my boss and never was last friday, and instead she has been "mentoring" me all this while, and when I ask her for her opinions, they are only that "her opinions" not directives or orders. What the hell?!! I'm now to do whatever the Queen Bee says. Effectively but unofficially I'm under HRH's wings. My only concern is that being under her wings connotes the opposite of what that phrase is suppose to mean.
My whole weekend was one depression after another. I feel betrayed, majorly. Sigh. What am I? A ball that can be kicked and passed around at any time? I wanted to quit and walk out of that room when I was told. HRH went to hash out the PR side with my "former" boss and they ended up discussing me. I heard them as the door was not closed. So I got handed over to another boss to do as she will.
Of course, I'm lamenting about it. If you're rolling your eyes at my post, then you can keep rolling, coz at this moment, I'm in no mood to listen to anyone. I'm just feeling overwhelmed and in over my head.
And of course today couldn't be made more stressful with an email to all the big heads officially announcing my new 'position', from the CEO. No the new possition doesn't come with additional benefits, so you can understand my pickle.
Why am I being made to handle such a big load when I have no experience to back it up?!! I feel HRH's frustrations at me when things doesn't go her way and of course the past one month has been so stressful that I've thought about giving in my resignation letter a million times a week. The only thing stopping me is not wanting to be a failure. I've never been a failure in anything I've done so far and I really don't want an big splash of ink blot in my life's chapter.
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