Sigh... being in transition jobwise is sooo not fun. Luck be a lady today and let someone give me pay! Argh... I know wishing as sure as hell will not get me what I want in life... these things only happen to beautiful princesses with cuddly animals as their sidekicks... *puke*. Disney shouldn't be filling little girls' head with such nonsense dreams and ideas. You know I read an article titled "Alien values in books?' today by Chong Sheau Ching. The article talks about how our local readers are not bothered reading local books bu local authors, "Because you all write about Malaysia. I don't want to read what I know!" apparently a local reader yelled. You know as a young writer myself, who would one day make it out in the local scene, I see what Ms Chong is trying to say. We do not give enough credit and respect to the talents living next door to us. It is all good to read books from the west... but what about the books from the east? After all we ARE asians. Shamefully, I used to think that the western ideals were ideal to my nature. But after studying in Australia, and living the life that I thought I wanted, I find myself clinging to my asian values. I finally understand now that I am Asian and I am proud to be part of a great culture. But then I am not totally chinese chinese either. I still cannot bring myself to appreciate or even value some chinese customs and mannerisms that we see so dominant among some.
But why are we prejudiced against creative materials by our local talents? Fine we compare them to the western ones but we forget that we are NOT western but rather westernised to the core by movies and music and books. Books will broaden as well as narrow our minds. It is up to us to see the author's point of view and then analyse it so that we can come up with our own unique point of view. As to what that reader yelled... why not read what you already know and gain a broader perspective on things? Also, those books were written by westerners FOR westerners; a little fact that many tend to forget. Westerners have tried to write about us but it is still a western point of view. If a westerner and an asian were to write about the same topic, different views will emerge and thoughts are diversified.
Lastly, I would like to quote William Hazlitt who wrote 'On the tendency of Sects' : " There is no prejudice so strong as that which arises from a fancied exemption from all
prejudice."
Thursday, March 20, 2003
Thursday, March 13, 2003
My birthday was ages ago *_* on the 8th and I am only just writing about it. Gosh it has been a busy week for me. I went over to Lee Na�s place on Wednesday to take care of the kids. They really ran me ragged. I was a housewife for two days and it left me tired and sick of playing house. It is not the kids but rather the housework that came along with the whole babysitting concept. Na weren�t home most of the time as she had to be at the office helping Kok Eng wrap and move the furniture to the new office. That meant that I had to wash and clean and all that. Washing milk bottles is the ultimate mind breaker.
This is how it works: Children drops bottles anywhere and everywhere. You bring it to the sink and soak it. Then you have to wash them thoroughly and leave them out to dry a bit. Then the bottles and tits have to be sterilized. While you are waiting you continue washing the gazillion milk bottles sitting at the sink waiting to be washed. Then when the little red light goes off on the sterilizer, you take it out immediately and make milk for the children, who were all this time waiting at your elbows, waiting for their milk and asking you a million questions without waiting for your answers. Fine so the milk is made and the children goes off happily sucking to their little heart�s content, while you are still stuck in the horribly-ventilated kitchen facing the mountain of bottles and plastic cups and plates. No sooner are you done with a batch when a new dirty batch arrives. Thus the vicious cycle continues.
The only time off you get is when there is a cry coming from somewhere in the house and you rush off to see what is wrong, dripping suds that you will later mop up when you find that the cry is nothing but a frustrated one that was caused by a little sibling rivalry. Sigh� Out of the three, Daniel is the most precocious. He reminds me of the poem about the little girl with the curl on her forehead. When Daniel is good, he is really sweet and good. But when he is bad, he is sooo bad that I sent him to the corner every 3 hours or so. Of course he will stare at me mutinously with arms crossed and nose horizontally high in the air. Lord, where did that little boy learn such behaviour? So when he reluctantly trudge to the corner, he is crying copiously and spouting gibberish with the word �hate� and �bad� interspeeded with the usual wailing sound effects. Of course after a few minutes, there is silence and he is peeking out at the corner of his eyes to see if you are looking at him. If you are then the wailing starts and increases in volume. So most of the time, I ignore him and continue with the housework. When my sister comes home, I�m like totally pushing the reins into her hands and I�m off to shower away the day�s grime and sweat. Sigh, how does she do it day by day? I really have to salute her for being so patient and all� Makes me wonder how the heck am I going to cope when my time comes� argh� thinking about it will drive me nuts. So I am going to shut that thought at the back of my mind where no light shines.
Okay so I left Lee Na�s place on Friday evening as I had a birthday dinner to attend � my birthday dinner organized by Estella and Jaymee with the Tjj group. So the taxi dropped me off around 5pm� I had to rush to wash my hair and bathe so that I will again smell nice and be decent for public display. Getting ready is fast for me, but it is the waiting for my hair to dry parts that really drags the time. I had to break my own rule and blow dry my hair, but I avoided the hot air and just basically stood in front of the fan and blowing cool air with the hairdryer. Okay so I�m all ready and decent by 7pm. Tried calling for a cab and there was NONE! In this big metropolitan city, there wasn�t any cab that was willing or free to pick me up??? It was so frustrating and I was late already, since the reservation was for 7.30pm. Called Estella, Jaymee and Vijay and all went into their voicemail. Then I called Andrew and he offered to pick me up when I lamented about the taxis� desertion. So we finally arrive at 8pm at TGIF. Estella and Winnie was already there and there were 10 other empty seats. Those seats did not fill up until 9.30pm.
So there we were, Vijay, Winnie, Andrew, Amy, Estella and I waiting for the rest to show up so that we can order. Anyway, we started ordering after Jaymee arrived. Then the TGIF crew made me stand on a chair while they sang me the usual birthday thing. It was embarrassing. My friends got a cake for me and we all ate the delicious cake. After that Estella, Jaymee Andrew and I went to Bangsar for a little post dinner clubbing at Silver�s. Met with the bouncer again and he remembered me. So chatted a little with him and introduced him to the rest of them. Then we hit the bar and it was Ladies Nite. Sigh� why is it that no one can down tequila? I have no drinking buddy. Anyway, after that we danced. Vijay came and went as he had another group of friends waiting for him at another bar. Then Edward and Fun came and stayed. It was fun I guess but none of them could keep up with me on the dance floor. In the end I was left alone dancing on the dance floor, facing the mirror that line. A funny thing happened. An Indian guy started dancing next to me a few feet away but I ignored him. Anyway, he had his space and I had mine and my body language broadcasted �I�m not interested�. So there we were dancing when suddenly reflected in the mirror was a paper ball sailing in the air and it hit the Indian guy on the head! That was sooo funny, I couldn�t help but grin. Of course he saw me grinning and he gestured for me to dance with him, but I shook my head. Later his friends laughingly drag him of the dance floor. By 2pm, there were considerably less people left on the dance floor. I had basically the whole floor to myself. Then Estella came and told me they were ready to go back. It was a fun night� it could be better though.
The next day, I couldn�t wake up so I had to push my 12 o�clock lunch date with Chion to 1pm at KLCC. Met up with Chion at 1.30pm and she treated me to pasta at California Pizza Kitchen. I wanted to pay as she paid the last time but she insisted since it was my birthday. Sigh she is sooo stubborn. Next time I�ll have to catch her unawares and pay the bill before she can. It was a good day. I have not seen her for months and it as like old times. We just sat and chatted for hours. I really missed her, my best friend.
Then later I went to Bangsar with Zona, Andy, Masrey and Sony. We hung out at the mamak and just people watch. It is amazing how many people go to Bangsar on a Saturday night. I met Benison there but he was busy supervising the Ciggy girls. He is so hardworking � he has a day job at Nanyang and a nighttime job, supervising these girls. He makes me ashamed of myself being jobless and lazy and all. He is working to get money to study and this makes me feel worse. Get off your BUTT and GET A JOB SHARON!!!!!! ARGGHHH!
Okay, I�m better now. Chill woman�. Do the shrewish screaming later when no one is around. Ahem where was I? Oh yeah� after the mamak thing, we went to another mamak smoke those jar thingies. I took a puff and it wasn�t so bad until the last second of exhalation. It got stuck in my throat. My throat felt constricted and I had to drink water to ease my airway� *choke* We just chilled there until 1am. Then Zona and I just drove around catching up. Went to another mamak; just the both of us to talk. After that I got home around 3am. Then I went online to check my mail and ended up being online until 6am as Zona and Masrey was online as well� so we chatted again.
Funnily enough, Zona and I are opening up to each other more. When we were chatting online, I told her things I initially didn�t think to tell her. I don�t know about her though� I felt that our relationship is gaining depth but I could be wrong� *shrug* I have been before.
The next day, had to drag myself out of bed again to catch a movie with Hoon and Ling at Midvalley. After the movie the day was spent hunting for a laptop with Ling while Hoon went clothes shopping. Argh! So not fun. I�ve been doing the lappie hunting for the past three weeks with Ling already and I�m weary of this whole thing. My sister is soooooo freaking fussy and she doesn�t know what she wants. I don�t blame her though� it is her money and she should be careful on how she spent it. But she has so many criterias� The computer guy is probably scared of us now. *grin* We were in Midvalley until 8pm. We were suppose to wait for Mom and Na to join us but they took so long and were late that we went home instead. All three of us were tired and the prospect of waiting for somebody was too bleak so we sms Na to tell her we were going home.
Thus ends my week�s birthday saga. Whattaweek... *phew* ^_^
This is how it works: Children drops bottles anywhere and everywhere. You bring it to the sink and soak it. Then you have to wash them thoroughly and leave them out to dry a bit. Then the bottles and tits have to be sterilized. While you are waiting you continue washing the gazillion milk bottles sitting at the sink waiting to be washed. Then when the little red light goes off on the sterilizer, you take it out immediately and make milk for the children, who were all this time waiting at your elbows, waiting for their milk and asking you a million questions without waiting for your answers. Fine so the milk is made and the children goes off happily sucking to their little heart�s content, while you are still stuck in the horribly-ventilated kitchen facing the mountain of bottles and plastic cups and plates. No sooner are you done with a batch when a new dirty batch arrives. Thus the vicious cycle continues.
The only time off you get is when there is a cry coming from somewhere in the house and you rush off to see what is wrong, dripping suds that you will later mop up when you find that the cry is nothing but a frustrated one that was caused by a little sibling rivalry. Sigh� Out of the three, Daniel is the most precocious. He reminds me of the poem about the little girl with the curl on her forehead. When Daniel is good, he is really sweet and good. But when he is bad, he is sooo bad that I sent him to the corner every 3 hours or so. Of course he will stare at me mutinously with arms crossed and nose horizontally high in the air. Lord, where did that little boy learn such behaviour? So when he reluctantly trudge to the corner, he is crying copiously and spouting gibberish with the word �hate� and �bad� interspeeded with the usual wailing sound effects. Of course after a few minutes, there is silence and he is peeking out at the corner of his eyes to see if you are looking at him. If you are then the wailing starts and increases in volume. So most of the time, I ignore him and continue with the housework. When my sister comes home, I�m like totally pushing the reins into her hands and I�m off to shower away the day�s grime and sweat. Sigh, how does she do it day by day? I really have to salute her for being so patient and all� Makes me wonder how the heck am I going to cope when my time comes� argh� thinking about it will drive me nuts. So I am going to shut that thought at the back of my mind where no light shines.
Okay so I left Lee Na�s place on Friday evening as I had a birthday dinner to attend � my birthday dinner organized by Estella and Jaymee with the Tjj group. So the taxi dropped me off around 5pm� I had to rush to wash my hair and bathe so that I will again smell nice and be decent for public display. Getting ready is fast for me, but it is the waiting for my hair to dry parts that really drags the time. I had to break my own rule and blow dry my hair, but I avoided the hot air and just basically stood in front of the fan and blowing cool air with the hairdryer. Okay so I�m all ready and decent by 7pm. Tried calling for a cab and there was NONE! In this big metropolitan city, there wasn�t any cab that was willing or free to pick me up??? It was so frustrating and I was late already, since the reservation was for 7.30pm. Called Estella, Jaymee and Vijay and all went into their voicemail. Then I called Andrew and he offered to pick me up when I lamented about the taxis� desertion. So we finally arrive at 8pm at TGIF. Estella and Winnie was already there and there were 10 other empty seats. Those seats did not fill up until 9.30pm.
So there we were, Vijay, Winnie, Andrew, Amy, Estella and I waiting for the rest to show up so that we can order. Anyway, we started ordering after Jaymee arrived. Then the TGIF crew made me stand on a chair while they sang me the usual birthday thing. It was embarrassing. My friends got a cake for me and we all ate the delicious cake. After that Estella, Jaymee Andrew and I went to Bangsar for a little post dinner clubbing at Silver�s. Met with the bouncer again and he remembered me. So chatted a little with him and introduced him to the rest of them. Then we hit the bar and it was Ladies Nite. Sigh� why is it that no one can down tequila? I have no drinking buddy. Anyway, after that we danced. Vijay came and went as he had another group of friends waiting for him at another bar. Then Edward and Fun came and stayed. It was fun I guess but none of them could keep up with me on the dance floor. In the end I was left alone dancing on the dance floor, facing the mirror that line. A funny thing happened. An Indian guy started dancing next to me a few feet away but I ignored him. Anyway, he had his space and I had mine and my body language broadcasted �I�m not interested�. So there we were dancing when suddenly reflected in the mirror was a paper ball sailing in the air and it hit the Indian guy on the head! That was sooo funny, I couldn�t help but grin. Of course he saw me grinning and he gestured for me to dance with him, but I shook my head. Later his friends laughingly drag him of the dance floor. By 2pm, there were considerably less people left on the dance floor. I had basically the whole floor to myself. Then Estella came and told me they were ready to go back. It was a fun night� it could be better though.
The next day, I couldn�t wake up so I had to push my 12 o�clock lunch date with Chion to 1pm at KLCC. Met up with Chion at 1.30pm and she treated me to pasta at California Pizza Kitchen. I wanted to pay as she paid the last time but she insisted since it was my birthday. Sigh she is sooo stubborn. Next time I�ll have to catch her unawares and pay the bill before she can. It was a good day. I have not seen her for months and it as like old times. We just sat and chatted for hours. I really missed her, my best friend.
Then later I went to Bangsar with Zona, Andy, Masrey and Sony. We hung out at the mamak and just people watch. It is amazing how many people go to Bangsar on a Saturday night. I met Benison there but he was busy supervising the Ciggy girls. He is so hardworking � he has a day job at Nanyang and a nighttime job, supervising these girls. He makes me ashamed of myself being jobless and lazy and all. He is working to get money to study and this makes me feel worse. Get off your BUTT and GET A JOB SHARON!!!!!! ARGGHHH!
Okay, I�m better now. Chill woman�. Do the shrewish screaming later when no one is around. Ahem where was I? Oh yeah� after the mamak thing, we went to another mamak smoke those jar thingies. I took a puff and it wasn�t so bad until the last second of exhalation. It got stuck in my throat. My throat felt constricted and I had to drink water to ease my airway� *choke* We just chilled there until 1am. Then Zona and I just drove around catching up. Went to another mamak; just the both of us to talk. After that I got home around 3am. Then I went online to check my mail and ended up being online until 6am as Zona and Masrey was online as well� so we chatted again.
Funnily enough, Zona and I are opening up to each other more. When we were chatting online, I told her things I initially didn�t think to tell her. I don�t know about her though� I felt that our relationship is gaining depth but I could be wrong� *shrug* I have been before.
The next day, had to drag myself out of bed again to catch a movie with Hoon and Ling at Midvalley. After the movie the day was spent hunting for a laptop with Ling while Hoon went clothes shopping. Argh! So not fun. I�ve been doing the lappie hunting for the past three weeks with Ling already and I�m weary of this whole thing. My sister is soooooo freaking fussy and she doesn�t know what she wants. I don�t blame her though� it is her money and she should be careful on how she spent it. But she has so many criterias� The computer guy is probably scared of us now. *grin* We were in Midvalley until 8pm. We were suppose to wait for Mom and Na to join us but they took so long and were late that we went home instead. All three of us were tired and the prospect of waiting for somebody was too bleak so we sms Na to tell her we were going home.
Thus ends my week�s birthday saga. Whattaweek... *phew* ^_^
Sunday, March 09, 2003
It's my party and I'll cry if I want to.... Haha... technically my birthday was yesterday... seeing it is already wayyyy past midnight, mah birthday is over. Well, went to a party held in my honour at TGIF on friday and had to do the whole singalong thing... so embarassing. You know I'm bushed.... So I'm not going to record this year's birthday bash... too lazy.
Just came back from mamak with Zona. Went to Bangsar and hung out with Zon, Andy, Masrey and Sony. Chilling out I guess on teh ais limaus. So pretty tired. Went to lunch with Chion at KLCC before. Gosh I miss that woman. I have not seen her for months. We just sat there at California Pizza Kitchen for 3 hours just catching up. It was cool. Later dude and dudettes... :P
Just came back from mamak with Zona. Went to Bangsar and hung out with Zon, Andy, Masrey and Sony. Chilling out I guess on teh ais limaus. So pretty tired. Went to lunch with Chion at KLCC before. Gosh I miss that woman. I have not seen her for months. We just sat there at California Pizza Kitchen for 3 hours just catching up. It was cool. Later dude and dudettes... :P
Tuesday, March 04, 2003
*Groan* I have a headache and it is threatening to worsen. *Silent arrgh* Went shopping with sister #2 today at Tangs, Star Hill. It is not a good sale, the clothes were so-so with a lot of blouses sporting the bias cut which of course looks like a curtain drape on me. It is not because I'm thin or anything remotely fashionable, it is just that I'm quite horizontally challenged that I need clothes that are cut close so that my horizontally challenged figure can be shown as unhorizontally challenged as possible. Anyway, I find that I no longer find shopping as gratifying as I used to. Gee... I must getting along in my years. *Cackle* I used to be able to shop for 8 hours and stopping only for refreshments in those young nubile days. Now... my bones are weary as my feet by the time I try on the third what-ever-I-picked-up-along-the-way-to-the-changing-room. Came home with a paper bag from Body Shop and a plastic bag carrying my precious soya drink. These cravings for soya is weird I tell you. Must be deficient of something.
Tjj's members are planning a birthday dinner for me at TGIF this friday night. Estella, Jayme, Vijay, Jesse, Andrew and Winnie agreed to have a birthday dinner bash for me when we went to Pizza Uno last sunday night. Anyway, I'm feeling out of sorts coz I don't think they should by forking out so much money for someone whom they hardly know. I've only known the Tjj members for like 4 months. Don't get me wrong, these are very nice people. I just feel like a fraud to them... coz I know I'm not on the same plain of niceness that they are. I'm a witch sometimes you see... so that's why I feel weird now. Anyway, I called Vijay last night about this and we totally went off topic. We talked about a lot of stuff for 2 hours! Kinda cool to be able to talk to a new friend as easily as this. He's a nice person.
So tomorrow I'll be heading over to sister #1's place to babysit for a few days. Then I'll be back on Friday to go for the TGIF thingie. I'll be turning 25 this saturday... OLD!!!
Tjj's members are planning a birthday dinner for me at TGIF this friday night. Estella, Jayme, Vijay, Jesse, Andrew and Winnie agreed to have a birthday dinner bash for me when we went to Pizza Uno last sunday night. Anyway, I'm feeling out of sorts coz I don't think they should by forking out so much money for someone whom they hardly know. I've only known the Tjj members for like 4 months. Don't get me wrong, these are very nice people. I just feel like a fraud to them... coz I know I'm not on the same plain of niceness that they are. I'm a witch sometimes you see... so that's why I feel weird now. Anyway, I called Vijay last night about this and we totally went off topic. We talked about a lot of stuff for 2 hours! Kinda cool to be able to talk to a new friend as easily as this. He's a nice person.
So tomorrow I'll be heading over to sister #1's place to babysit for a few days. Then I'll be back on Friday to go for the TGIF thingie. I'll be turning 25 this saturday... OLD!!!