Bloody phew

Okay it's like this, GM alerts me that the ATA is happening. Ask me to ask Head of Group Marketing Head if we want to submit. So I asked. Permission given to submit our works. Time sees Sharon running ahead of it, like a crazy baboon trying to get information from all sides so that she can complete her forms. She calls everyone and chases them on this and that - everybody was busy but Sharon was really running against TIme so she had no choice but to snap at some butts. She was not happy about that but she had no choice coz said butts were moving too slow. She gets budget done and approved by three department heads. All looks good. But a lot of information is not in yet. So she chase butts again. Running around like super baboon. She even went back to the office on a Saturday so that she can supervise the subtitling for the chinese entries. So far so good. Information not in yet. She chases more butts. In the end, above mentioned butts useless, so Sharon takes over the lead and gets her own information. She also makes some up coz some information couldn't be obtain as butts who were suppose to provide it were too busy for her to chase.

Today she compiles ALL information, prints it out nice and black. She goes to get signature from GM. GM looks through all, and then said not her jurisdiction. Ask Sharon to go get signature from CEO. Fine. Sharon waits for CEO to be available, until after lunch. Her deadline was 4pm today. CEO finally available at 3.30pm. She goes in and brief him on what's going on. Then he asked about which entries DV's submitting. Sharon tells him. He is shocked and says entries not worth submitting if they have no chance to win. He demands to know who authorise this and refuses to sign. Sharon tells him. He was angry and said that he will take it up with management. He tells Sharon not to send anything. Sharon goes away "shocked".

Later at 5pm, Head of Finance calls Sharon to her room. Questions her about this. Sharon tells her she was the one who approved the budget. She then asked who authorised this. Sharon gives name. Head calls in CEO and explains again which was what sharon explained earlier on. He then decides that we should send in three of our best entries.Sharon obviously lacking in clout. Wonders if she can fashion one from a cengal tree. Anyway all are convinced that those entries have good chance of winning award. CEO directs Sharon to send in three. But it is too late to send today and UPS guy already gone home for dinner. Latest Sharon can send it tomorrow morning, day of latest deadline. Sharon calls Asian Television Awards people, people says ok. Sharon says "Phew" and prepare everything to be send off tomorrow morning.

Bloody HELL

Omigawd I'm freakin' hyperventilating right now! Argh! I just talked to the CEO and he axed the idea of sending some of Double Vision's works for the Asian Television Awards! AND I've been working to death the past two weeks so that I can send out our submission on time! Then he says "NO". ARGHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!! With a "Who gave you permission to send them?" thrown in!

DIE! DIE! DIE!

Possible reasons

I'm waiting for my colleague to finish the chinese-translation for a show that we are submitting to the Asian Television Awards and the Malaysian Movie Awards. Sigh... and it's already so late. Bah. So with so much time on my hands and no motivation to do more work as it is FRIDAY NIGHT, I'm wont to let my mind wonder.

As I sit here contemplating my life, I wonder why I'm single? I see plenty of girls out there who has found love and I've left wondering "What the heck is wrong with me that makes me so unlovable?" But then, it is not as if I didn't have several chances along the way to "hook" one as they say it, so what went wrong? Could it be that I'm scared of commitment? The forever part? But that's crazy, isn't that what all girls want? I had a chance to embark on a relationship roller coaster several months back, but I chose not to. He later told me I sabotaged the "relationship" by not letting him into my soul. I later figured he meant that I didn't talk to him more or confide in him as I do with my friends. I don't know. Maybe deep down I knew he wasn't right for me and that was why I didn't bother going down that path.

Maybe another reason I'm single is because I don't know how to read the signs and take advantage of them. Maybe. Somebody once mentioned that I do not take initiatives to start a relationship, that I always wait for the other person to make the first move. Is that true? I always thought I was quite bold in my approaching the opposite sex. Maybe I'm wrong.

I hate being single yet I love the freedom of not having to answer to another person other than my family. Maybe that's why I'm single, coz I put my family above all else. This one is a biggie.

Maybe I shouldn't ask why. Maybe this is meant to be. I'll just have to accept it that I might never settle down with someone. And let Life just be.

Is it so wrong to want someone special to call your own, the same someone who will be there forever? Someone I can lean on instead of always having to be the strong one or someone's buddy who is always there. I'm tired of taking care of others. I'm tired of thinking about others. It would be nice to be taken care of for a change.

My thoughts are rambling. It has no sense nor direction.

My brain is starting to hurt... *sigh*

Maybe... Maybe I'm too choosy...

Estranged

I've been so quiet today that I've lost my ability to socialise. Today, the marketing dept celebrated two of my colleagues birthday and even though they invited me, I didn't feel like a part of their group. I felt out of place. So I left. I didn't want to be there when it doesn't seem right for me to be there.

I feel disjointed from the rest of the world. The estrangement doesn't just happen on my side but from theirs as well, so I guess all sides are mutually keeping away from each other. But why? It is not as if that is what I want to happened but somehow it did. Whatever triggered it... was it my fault? Did I do something wrong?

But the thing I figured about the other side is that they aren't very connectable. It might seem weird but that is the way I feel at the moment. They are social friends. I get that. They aren't close friends and I should think of them as such. I should.

Cut off at the knees

Since MaXX-a-Million has been suspended until further notice, my work load has lessened by loads and I'm now back to doing my usual job scopes, publicity for Double Vision's programmes. It's soooo boring that I'm considering quitting already. I guess it is obvious I don't like writing press releases - it's so dry and flat. There's nothing exciting about doing that. But the one thing I like about this is getting to arrange things. One of the things I learned from managing the Maxx roadshows is that I like managing things. I like being in charge. Who doesn't? I like the calling of suppliers and scouting for things and calling up tons of people and arranging for things to happen. It is more productive than my writing of press releases. And it is my personal opinion that the press people that I've had the privilege to meet so far are snobs. I'm surprise that they listen to bad sources and judge without actual proof. Aren't all journalist suppose to be fair-minded people who are not bias in any way and reserve the right to judge for themselves and not judge based on gossip? Hmmph. If any of you who are reading my blogs are journalists, I hope you're not like that. So far I've met some from big papers and they are snobs.

Oh well, I'll have to meet more so that I can meet the good ones.

All this just makes me question whether I want to join the journalism crowd. I did consider going back to journalism, the profession I was trained for but innately, I rebelled against that idea. I guess maybe I don't like writing as much as I thought. The jury's not out on that one yet.

Going back to the topic, I'm now going home at normal hours. Haha. No more late nights and office take-outs. Of course things aren't totally back to normal yet, there are things to finalise. Loose ends to tie and housekeeping. My project manager asked me to help her translate a script the other day and boy, did I have to relearn my BM. I'm rusty, I need to brush up on my BM language skills. Eeek. Embarrassing la. But I got that done and gave it to Helen. But then she's not native so she doesn't know if it's correct or skewed. Guess she will run it by a native tomorrow. *grin*

Anyway, I feel sad. Even though MaXX was a pain in the butt, I have gotten used to the sting, I was even enjoying myself. You masochist. It just gall that it was not FINISHED. There's no completion, no closure. How can something so huge not have a closure? Seriously, the people who banned SMS contests are pea-brained, 'dungunfied' carcasses who doesn't seem to grasp the fact that humans are intelligent beings, that they are not God and that they can never hope to speak for others other than themselves. Those apes have no idea what they are doing and they are just doing it for the sake of hearing themselves speak. They do not understand anything but they pretend that they have the abilities to understand and spout words! If SMS contests have gambling elements, then ALL contests have gambling elements! That is the point of contests - it's all about chance. There is no such thing as entering a contest and assured a winning spot. If that's the case, then that's CHARITY. Idiots.

Ok, I'll stop ranting now and go back to my search of NZ's accommodations. Yeah, am thinking of going somewhere different this time instead of Perth. ^_^